My Next Steps

Thriving during adversity

Am I going to die – Part 1? What did I do wrong? (2/20/2025) June 27, 2026

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 1:17 pm
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While I was becoming a student of cancer and all its treatments, my mind seemed to be bound by the central question, “why?” and “What did I do wrong?”.  My brain was the tether-ball tied to the pole of “why did I get cancer?”. I’ve heard that just before you die, you see glimpses of all the wonderful snippets of your life – a life recap of sorts. But as I mull this diagnosis with all its possible future ramifications, the slow-motion newsreel takes on a different theme. Every. Thing. That. I. Have. Ever. Done. Wrong.

  • Did I smoke, do drugs, drink to excess? No. No. No.
  • Is my diet terrible? No – especially for the prior 1.5 yrs it’s even been terrific (ketogenic – with no starches, no sugar, only meat, dairy, and non-starchy vegetables).
  • Do I have family history of breast cancer? – No, going back 3 generations.

Now to the hard part of the self-reflection.

  • Did I ever exercise enough? NO. Did I have a sedentary job most of my career? YES.
  • Did I eat processed food for much of my life (prior to the KETO diet)? YES.
  • Have I made poor choices in my life? YES.
    • The devil specifically leaned in on all those poor choices, hinting that perhaps my cancer was penance for those moments. What a jerk he is. I have long-ago reconciled those poor choices with God, repented and lead a new life.
  • Books like Cancer As A Metabolic Disease (which is a great book) can also fan the flame of past lifestyle environmental behaviors, like exposure to micro-plastics, fumes inhaled, chemical exposure, carcinogenic makeup/soap/lotion ingredients, and other environmental causes. Was I perfect? No. Was I the worst? No.
  • Then there’s the HRT (hormone replacement therapy), prescribed by my gynocologist after my full hysterectomy. Some studies show a link between HRT and breast cancer. And my cancer is hormone (estrogen and progesterone) positive.
  • And lastly, some studies show a link between women who don’t give birth or breast feed and breast cancer. That’s me.

Pause. Breathe. Time to focus on how do I resolve this medical issue? Not wallow in “what did I do wrong?”.

“When you know better, do better.” Maya Angelou

“There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

“What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.” Psalm 56:3

 

Drinking from a firehose – time to get organized (2/18/2025)

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 12:54 pm
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After receiving confirmation that this, indeed, was MY pathology report and I, in fact, did have cancer in my right breast, the research and phone calls began in earnest. This was real. When my brain is swimming in questions and I lack knowledge, I immediately seek it out (books, videos, Googling, input from trusted friends). My husband is also a great researcher, so our days and nights in those first few weeks were consumed with watching myriad YouTube videos, reading a half-dozen books (thanks to Amazon Prime), and speaking with close friends who had experienced at least some of what I was about to experience.

Was cut-burn-poison the only treatment option? What about alternatives and complementary treatments? Could I increase my chances of survival by doing twice as much. [Did I just write that word “survival”?]

The more I studied, the more confused I became. Occasionally, the sources contradicted each other, depending on the how I phrased my query. I spoke to Girlfriends#1, who had a lumpectomy, no chemo, and 4 weeks of radiation 6 months prior to my diagnosis. And then I gathered input from Girlfriend#2, who had a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation 20 years ago. Although their type and stage of breast cancer was different than mine, their experiences still provided insights into how they managed through various treatments, side-effects, and recommendations for oncologists, surgeons, and facilities. Even with all that info, there was so much more to distill before my next steps.

I’m retired now, but my career was in the field of technology (selling, marketing, strategic planning). For decades, my method for turning confusion into actionable data to analyze was to create a spreadsheet. That’s just nerd-talk for making a list with columns and rows. My first Excel sheet contained:

  • Questions for my surgeon (how soon, surgical options, risks, after-effects)
  • Questions for my functional GP, since he would be more open to complementary treatments and supplements (how to protect my gut microbiome, options to reduce side effects while not diminishing the oncology treatments)
  • Online research from reputable cancer organizations (possible treatments complementary to cut-burn-poison)
  • Helpful supplements
  • Dietary suggestions – what to eat/not eat (my oncologist didn’t have strong advice on this topic other than the standard of care answer every US physician gives regardless of medical issue…”eat Mediterranean diet”)
  • What to measure throughout the treatments (more on this separate chart later)

I slept better after aggregating all this info into one spot. My questions would at least be a bit more coherent.

“I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye.” Psalm 32:8

 

Not My First Health Rodeo – Decisions to Make June 25, 2026

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 4:42 pm
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My 6+ decades of life have been speckled with unexpected health anomalies. So far, I’ve survived them all, thank you Jesus.

At 27, sudden appendicitis resulted in an emergency appendectomy. Then at age 37, a stealthy brainstem hemorrhage forever altered my life, paralyzing my entire left side (head to toe) which took 6 months of rehab to bring me back to “normal” activities of daily living. All function returned to the left half of my body, albeit permanently slower (foot, leg, circulation, hand, arm, and vocal cord). Due to walking with a slight limp for 30 years since that stroke, my poor joints are worse-for-wear, resulting in four left foot/ankle surgeries to repair. Then, late in the fall of my 65th year, I stumbled and fell, breaking my neck at C1-C2. Now I know what Frankenstein’s monster felt like.

One more bit of pertinent medical history. In 2017 (age 60), my annual gyno exam showed a large, benign tumor that necessitated removal. My gynecologist advised me that it would be wise to opt for a full hysterectomy to prevent future growths and because I had been in menopause for 6 years. My gynecologist sold me on the idea that HRT (hormone replacement therapy) was advisable to help keep all the cells in my body healthier and more resilient to aging. He prescribed bio-identical estrogen (patches) and daily progesterone pills.  So, when my 2025 breast biopsy confirmed cancer, I had been taking HRT for 7 years. After the initial cancer diagnosis, I began researching possible links between HRT and breast cancer. Even before the official pathology report came back, I took myself off HRT (mid-FEB 2025). I’m very glad I did. One small step that felt like taking a small amount of control.

Combining estradiol with synthetic progestins slightly increases the risk of breast cancer. This elevated risk primarily appears or becomes more pronounced after 3 to 5 years of consistent use.   www.breastcancer.org

I thought I was healthy…

 

Diagnosis and Denial – is this really happening? Did they get the wrong person? (2/14-16/2025)

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 3:23 pm
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On Friday, Feb 14, (yes, Valentine’s Day), I received a confusing and unexpected call from my former GP. We had transitioned to a different GP in Austin a year prior, but hadn’t updated records with the gynecologist who ordered the the biopsy. So the biopsy pathology report went to the wrong GP. He was surprised that I’d had a biopsy since he hadn’t seen me in over a year. Likewise, since results weren’t expected until the following week, I was surprised to hear from him (or anyone) that Friday afternoon. He gingerly read the pathology report to me and explained the diagnosis – CANCER. And then he referred me back to the OBGYN for next steps. I was in shock and wanted to see the report in writing so he let us drive to his office to pick up a hardcopy of the report so we could study it further.

To add to the confusion, neither my OBGYN (who ordered the biopsy), nor the biopsy facility received the report that Friday. Therefore, they didn’t call me to review the results. That’s when denial started to cloud my brain. I reasoned that perhaps they had the wrong Carol Clark. Common name, right? I doubted this news…All. Weekend. Long. It all seemed like a plausible mistake in a surreal way.

On Monday, after multiple calls to the gynecologist and biopsy facility, I eventually confirmed that this report WAS mine. How could this be? I had no symptoms, wasn’t sick and didn’t feel like I had cancer. I didn’t look like I had cancer. All of a sudden, next steps began to stream in as I was assigned a breast surgeon and an oncologist. This was happening! Breathe deeply.

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.   2 Timothy 1:7 KJV

 

Biopsy – this could be serious (2/12/2025)

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 3:01 pm

At the time of the 2025 mammogram, my husband and I had been eating a ketogenic diet for over one year. Following a Keto lifestyle includes high fats (healthy ones), super low carbs (no starches, grains, bread), and no sugar. He was diagnosed with type II diabetes the end of 2023, so Keto was not simply a temporary diet for us, rather a new way of eating to reverse his glucose and insulin levels. And it worked! Although my glucose and insulin levels were already great, I chose to mirror the Keto way of life to help him attain his health goal. Surprise, surprise – I lost 35 pounds that first year (2024). Because my bloodwork wasn’t at risk, I’d cheat sporadically with a little sugar or a tiny bit of bread. I’d have a piece of dark chocolate to “wash down” my melatonin before bed. Why not?

But once the biopsy was scheduled and cancer was a distinct possibility, the periodic cheats stopped. Things got very real, very quickly. As I lay on the table Feb 12th with a large needle extracting bits of flesh from my breast to determine if cancer lurked inside, my thoughts realigned about whether I needed a sweet treat. And that was before I heard the pathology results.

“Things alter for the worse spontaneously, if they be not altered for the better designedly.” Francis Bacon, British author and statesman

 

Annual mammogram – probably nothing (1/30/2025) June 22, 2026

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 3:04 pm

2025 began with the usual organizing and planning — my time of annual reflection and renewal. I’ve always been a goal-seeking creature, therefore establishing personal goals in the New Year and aligning with God’s will and purpose for my life is crucial.

One goal I borrowed from the previous year was to have NO SURGERIES. By the Lord’s mercy I managed to avoid the operating room in 2024 (at 66), so why not this year? Sounded easy enough and I loved the idea of not prepping for surgery or setting aside recovery and healing time. Plus, accomplishing that goal would mean maintaining good health for the next 12 months.


Each year, my first medical appointment was always an annual exam with my gynecologist, including a mammogram. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been faithful to endure necessary albeit uncomfortable mammograms yearly. The findings for decades have always been “negative”, other than identifying that the tissue in my breasts were dense. When follow-up ultrasounds were indicated, they always resulted in “no issues found, see you next year”.

In late January 2025 when I went in for the follow-up ultrasound, I presumed the findings would be similar. But the serious face of the radiologist suggested a different possibility. She grimly recommended a right breast biopsy as soon as possible. With each succeeding procedure, I reiterated the history of dense breast tissue as though to convince them that they must be mistaken. Yet each time they assured me they saw something else – something they didn’t like.


“It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time.” Sir Winston Churchill

 

Introduction to MyNextSteps blog

Filed under: First Things First — cstatenclark @ 2:41 pm

How do I keep going after a huge life interruption? That’s what this blog is about — how to survive, even thrive, during life challenges and suffering. The answer is straight-forward (not simple). One. Day. At. A. Time. Each step I take is My Next Step. I don’t take those steps alone or uninformed, and each step is cumulative, leading to newness of life.

It turns out that decades of life bring with it dozens of interruptions, accompanied by thousands of daily choices about what the next step will be and how to move forward. And move forward I must, otherwise I get stuck in a valley where I don’t want to reside. I don’t get to choose my circumstances, but I do get to choose my next steps and reactions.

Last year brought another big interruption in my life – breast cancer! For years I thought I was relatively healthy. As it turns out, that’s a somewhat fragile state of being meaning that you’re healthy until you’re not. What lurks within often makes an appearance without notice. Like planning a business trip to CA, until a lingering headache spirals into a brainstem hemorrhage, holding me hostage in recovery for the next 6-12 months (more on that later). Or a routine annual exam turns into 12 months of toxic treatments to irradicate the mutant cells.

Last year (2025) began with many plans for summer vacation, home projects, and a 50th high school reunion. My routine January mammogram was, well,… meant to be routine, as it had been for decades. Then, within 2 weeks, it quickly spiraled into a sonogram, then a biopsy. There was no reason to anticipate a different result from all the prior years – “what we saw was benign, negative, see you next year”. In early 2025, the result was “positive” (in fact, triple positive).

I resist referring to the following 12 months as a journey, since that suggests planning, packing bags, and the joy of anticipation. I’ll call this an odyssey, which conjures up visions of a lengthy trek with unknown destination, monstrous obstacles along the way, and uncertain ending. But according to Homer, the monsters can be tamed (even defeated) with the right weapons. 

“When we face “pharaohs” in our lives—situations, people, diagnoses, or spiritual crises that refuse to yield and seem to have power over us—we must change our perspective. That seemingly invincible obstacle is not a sign that God has lost control, but the perfect stage He has allowed to glorify His name. The great opposition you face is not your end; it is the platform prepared for your miracle.” Roell Morales