My Next Steps

2025 began with the usual organizing and planning — my time of annual reflection and renewal. I’ve always been a goal-seeking creature, therefore establishing personal goals in the New Year and aligning with God’s will and purpose for my life is crucial.

One goal I borrowed from the previous year was to have NO SURGERIES. By the Lord’s mercy I managed to avoid the operating room in 2024 (at 66), so why not this year? Sounded easy enough and I loved the idea of not prepping for surgery or setting aside recovery and healing time. Plus, accomplishing that goal would mean maintaining good health for the next 12 months.

Each year, my first medical appointment was always an annual exam with my gynecologist, including a mammogram. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been faithful to endure necessary albeit uncomfortable mammograms yearly. The findings for decades have always been “negative”, other than identifying that the tissue in my breasts were dense. When follow-up ultrasounds were indicated, they always resulted in “no issues found, see you next year”.

In late January 2025 when I went in for the follow-up ultrasound, I presumed the findings would be similar. But the serious face of the radiologist suggested a different possibility. She grimly recommended a right breast biopsy as soon as possible. With each succeeding procedure, I reiterated the history of dense breast tissue as though to convince them that they must be mistaken. Yet each time they assured me they saw something else – something they didn’t like.

“It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time.” Sir Winston Churchill

How do I keep going after a huge life interruption? That’s what this blog is about — how to survive, even thrive, during life challenges and suffering. The answer is straight-forward (not simple). One. Day. At. A. Time. Each step I take is My Next Step. I don’t take those steps alone or uninformed, and each step is cumulative, leading to newness of life.

It turns out that decades of life bring with it dozens of interruptions, accompanied by thousands of daily choices about what the next step will be and how to move forward. And move forward I must, otherwise I get stuck in a valley where I don’t want to reside. I don’t get to choose my circumstances, but I do get to choose my next steps and reactions.

Last year brought another big interruption in my life – breast cancer! For years I thought I was relatively healthy. As it turns out, that’s a somewhat fragile state of being meaning that you’re healthy until you’re not. What lurks within often makes an appearance without notice. Like planning a business trip to CA, until a lingering headache spirals into a brainstem hemorrhage, holding me hostage in recovery for the next 6-12 months (more on that later). Or a routine annual exam turns into 12 months of toxic treatments to irradicate the mutant cells.

Last year (2025) began with many plans for summer vacation, home projects, and a 50th high school reunion. My routine January mammogram was, well,… meant to be routine, as it had been for decades. Then, within 2 weeks, it quickly spiraled into a sonogram, then a biopsy. There was no reason to anticipate a different result from all the prior years – “what we saw was benign, negative, see you next year”. In early 2025, the result was “positive” (in fact, triple positive).

I resist referring to the following 12 months as a journey, since that suggests planning, packing bags, and the joy of anticipation. I’ll call this an odyssey, which conjures up visions of a lengthy trek with unknown destination, monstrous obstacles along the way, and uncertain ending. But according to Homer, the monsters can be tamed (even defeated) with the right weapons. 

“When we face “pharaohs” in our lives—situations, people, diagnoses, or spiritual crises that refuse to yield and seem to have power over us—we must change our perspective. That seemingly invincible obstacle is not a sign that God has lost control, but the perfect stage He has allowed to glorify His name. The great opposition you face is not your end; it is the platform prepared for your miracle.” Roell Morales